An "Ask the Preacher" article as it has appeared in the Santa Rosa Press Gazette (Milton, Florida). The author is Pastor Carl Gallups of Hickory Hammock Baptist Church in Milton, Florida. Click HERE to go to the Main Index page of Hickory Hammock Baptist Church to read many more such articles. This article is copyrighted by Carl Gallups and may be reproduced provided that copyright notice is given.



Dear Pastor Gallups - I am a Christian dating an unbeliever. We are getting serious. Is it wrong for me to want to marry this person? What does the Bible say? I am getting so many different opinions on this. - M.J. -Milton.

Dear M.J. - Let me give you the straight scoop, straight from God's Word. A true born again believer in Jesus Christ should NOT marry an unbeliever. As a matter of fact, I often counsel singles and teens not to even DATE an unbeliever and take the chance that the relationship may even develop far enough that marriage may become an issue. For the child of God, the Bible is very clear on this matter. II Corinthians 6:14-15 is just one of many places where this important principle is made clear ("Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers.....).

Dr. Billy Graham, some years back, answered this same question in his column and he said, "When you take an unbeliever for your mate you also get the Devil as your father-in-law!" Well said. Something to think about, huh?

You may think that you can marry this person and then convert them after marriage. Very seldom does this happen. I have seen much heartache in the lives of believers who are now living with spouses who are very antagonistic toward their faith in Jesus. M.J., if the Lord has chosen a person for you, then HE is quite capable of bringing that person to salvation BEFORE you marry them!

Let me plead with you to wait upon the Lord for the one who will faithfully serve Jesus with you and help you bring up your future children in the love of Jesus. Let me also caution you, that just because this person may TELL you that they are now saved, in order to stay with you, you should very carefully observe a truly born again lifestyle in this person for a good period of time before you tie the knot forever!

If you will honor the Lord and be faithful to His Word in this most important area of your life now, I am sure that the Lord will greatly bless you and honor you in the years to come, particularly in your marriage relationship! You can never lose, by doing things GOD'S WAY!



Dear Pastor Gallups - Last week you wrote and told someone that they should not marry an unbeliever if they are a Christian. Well, what if you are a Christian who is already married to an unbeliever. Should you leave them? This is the situation that I am in. D.N.- Pace

Dear D.N., I Corinthians 7:12 -17 answers your question very clearly. Here, the Word makes clear that if you are a believer who is already married to an unbeliever, then you are to stay with that person unless they desire to leave you on account of your faith in Jesus. In that case, you are free from that relationship under the Lord. However, if you remarry, which you would be free to do according to the Word, you MUST marry a believer. The Bible is very clear on this matter.

This passage also points out that perhaps in your day to day living with your spouse, that they may indeed eventually come to the Lord Jesus with their life. This can be a long and painful process and in some cases it NEVER happens. However, there are those joyful instances of an unbelieving spouse coming to saving faith in Jesus Christ. What a wonderful thing that is, and, D.N., this is what I pray happens in your case.

D.N., it would have been better of course, if your spouse and you were both serving the Lord Jesus with your life BEFORE marriage. But, now that you are in this situation, the Lord desires HIS institution of marriage to be honored. Divorce is never permitted simply because one spouse is a believer and the other one is not. Let me urge you to faithfully live out your relationship to Jesus in your home, marriage, family, and job and where ever you go. The Lord will honor this in YOUR life and just perhaps, one-day soon, your spouse will surrender to the Lordship of Jesus also!